My best girlfriend has always been a pretty, very athletic woman, but COVID was tough on her, and I was surprised the first time I saw her after I squatted. She put on a lot of weight.
Right away, she noticed that I looked good (I look the same as before), and she said she looked awful – she described herself as “fat and ugly. “. I felt bad that she was evaluating herself that way and being so hard on herself. Yes, she put on a lot of weight, but she’s a beautiful girl, and given how active she was before, I’m sure she could get back to the size she wanted.
She looks super depressed. After this first outing, we no longer met in person. She says none of her clothes fit her well. She still works from home and I think she mainly wears sweatshirts and t-shirts. She also lives alone and is single and I don’t think she is hanging out with anyone.
I want to motivate her to get healthy and offer her support, but I don’t want to sound arrogant or critical. No advice? I am just very concerned about his welfare and want to get my happy girlfriend back.
A survey conducted earlier this year by the American Psychological Association found that 61% of adults reported unwanted weight changes during COVID-19 lockouts and closures, with 42% reporting weight gain. And that makes sense. During the lockdown, it was too easy to eat, drink and sit too much, racking up comfort calories to deal with the aggravated stress, questions and confusion of the pandemic.
So you can start by telling your friend that she is not alone. She probably knows it, but it will help her hear it. Many people are looking to reverse the unwanted developments that have affected their health and well-being in 2020, ranging from weight gain and high blood pressure to the compiled health issues related to skipping appointments. medical and dental.
Instead of inviting her in public where she is likely embarrassed by ill-fitting clothes and calorie choices like sugary cocktails and dining out, suggest a walk or hike. Pick an activity where she can stay in her comfort zone of comfy tracksuits and hoodies while taking real action to regain her health at the same time. If she’s up for it, suggest going out together to a gym or a house meeting to cook a healthy but delicious meal while catching up on each other’s lives.
Most importantly, let her know that you are there to support her, that you have certainly missed her during COVID and that you think she is a pretty great friend no matter what.
As much as I would love to play “Gym Guy” here and highly recommend my Alaska Action Get-Ripped-Super-Quick Nature Workout & Nutrition Program 100% Guaranteed, Wanda has covered the approach and support of the physical aspect of your friend’s situation in a much more thoughtful and subtle way. Instead, I’m going to focus on helping you and your friend focus on building the most important muscle as well. I’m talking brain on biceps.
Like many others, your friend’s struggles with getting out of COVID are as much, if not more, about her mental health than her physical condition. The pandemic has made a real number on us: Stress. Solitude. Depression. Anxiety. Substance abuse. Unfortunately, even suicide. Often times, our mental health issues affect our physical health and our chronic health issues, making us feel worse mentally. It is a difficult cycle that can quickly turn into a spiral that is difficult to stop and seemingly impossible to escape.
Fortunately, we come back to a place where we feel comfortable being surrounded by friends who care about us and connecting with professionals who can help us get out of the ruts and sort out our difficulties. Fortunately, your friend also seems to be being honest with you about her struggles, even if it results in negative self-talk. And the luckiest thing for your friend is that you are there for her, offering her a hug and a hand, and that’s the best you can give her right now. That love and support goes a lot further than a yoga punch card right now.
There are countless resources out there offering healthy ways to cope – and help others cope – with common, disabling, and crisis COVID mental health situations, starting with the CDC. Do a little research for her and for yourself. And then, be right there for her, working out at a pace that suits her, whether it’s at the gym, in the kitchen, or on the couch talking.