Look, I’ve been joking about CHAOS BALL since April, but at this point I have no more jokes and I’m wondering if there is a way to invest in Chaos Ball as Bitcoin as the Mariners are heading to the moon, baby. Did they have any business to gain from this game? Maybe, no! Probably even! Their starter didn’t have his good deals and got bounced in the fourth, while Oakland had his All-Star on the mound. The offensive was propelled by three Mitch Hanigers in trench coats. The home plate area of T-Mobile Park is to be swept away by the crazed avenging ghosts of Oakland house prices. But regardless, the Mariners won. The Mariners… won?
Gilbert came out, as he did recently, the guns: he got Mark Canha to a 0-2 count with a heat of 97 MPH before hitting him while watching. Things got a little risky for LoGi when he made a mistake on Tony Kemp, who laced up a 96 MPH fastball that caught too much plate in the right corner of the pitch, but Big Bert rebounded to take out Matt Olson then made a great play on a return from Jed Lowrie to end the round.
Gilbert was also sharp in his second inning, hitting Laureano on grabs, Mitch Moreland on a weak half swing, and then allowing Chapman to fly off easily. Unfortunately, the wheels broke for Gilbert in the third, when the A’s were able to wait for poor command from Logan, who lacked his secondary command of the jump, embarking on protracted battles with the young pitcher. This is something we saw in the minors, the days when Gilbert didn’t have his bending: Gilbert would go into long battles with the hitters and generally win them, but doing a lot of damage to his pitch count in the process. Today, he damaged both his pitch count (41 shots in that single inning) and the scoreboard, as the A’s took a 3-1 lead over four singles and a walk, taking advantage of ‘poor control as Gilbert fell behind in the scoring and found he had to rely almost exclusively on his fast pitch, which had fallen to 94-95 in this set. JT Chargois had to come in to clean things up to complete the set and get out the final as Gilbert’s pitching count soared in the ’70s. It was a disappointing outing after Gilbert put together such a solid game series. to start his young MLB career, to say the least, but that’s why they say development isn’t linear.
Like Gilbert’s night, the offense also got off to a good start and then knocked off the wheels. Haniger doubled up late in the first inning, then Ty France brought him home with a nice strike, redirecting a fastball running away from him through the 3/4 hole for an RBI single. Cal Raleigh, who’s sort of fifth now? came with two withdrawals and a man on, but to his credit went to a full account and worked a walk; Luis Torrens also had a full count with ten throws at bat, pushing Bassitt to over 30 throws, but was ultimately struck out on strikes.
From there, things got a lot easier for Bassitt and a lot harder for the Mariners hitters. Bassitt blew through the Mariners 1-2-3 squad’s soft underbelly in the second; he yielded a home run to Haniger, who had missed an earlier one, in the third period, but otherwise had a clean run. This Haniger home run came with the hilarious spectacle of Ramón Laureano literally climbing the paddock trying to steal it and completely melting away when he couldn’t, however, for me this home run counted double.
Forget the interference from the fans, it was direct interference from the players. Laureano got so far in the paddock that he received a white claw and a trial membership at Gold’s Gym. And ooooh it was DIRTY not to catch that ball:
(Unfortunately on the dashboard, that only counted as one.)
JT Chargois, continuing behind Logan Gilbert, worked a clean inning in the fourth (with the help of a double play that wiped out a goal from Elvis Andrus, who miraculously healed his bruised hand the other night). Anthony Misiewicz should have had a clean run to start the fifth, but JP mishandled an easy Canha Grounder and threw him into the Mariners’ dugout to effectively saddle Misiewicz with a starting brace. JP succeeded after that, jumping to catch a soft lineout from Tony Kemp, and Misiewicz again released a ground ball on his curve ball to make Olson fail, but that put a runner in third place with the perpetually boring Jed. Lowrie. However, JP pulled off his previous blunder again, catching another downed player on the curved ball and making a clever pitch to the first for the out.
Meanwhile, the Mariners hitters hung on against Bassitt. Jarred Kelenic was able to take Bassitt out in the fourth quarter, and while there were no runs through the plate, it increased his number of shots. Jake Bauers started the fifth with a nice row single, then, after a strikeout from JP Crawford (his second of the night, yikes emoji), Mitch Haniger arrived. Bassit smartly started Haniger with a slow curve at the bottom of the area Haniger fought savagely, then followed that up with a slider Haniger fired and a plate change he achieved after but was able to commit a mistake. Then Bassitt sailed a high step out of the zone to tie the score. What would he throw next?
Bassitt tried to get back to the slider, but oops, it slipped right in the middle of the plate, and Haniger was ready for it:
That Mitch Mash scored Oakland 3, Seattle’s Mitch Hanigers 4.
Armed with a one-point lead, it was up to the relievers’ pen to contain the advance of the hordes of various Matts and Marks. Casey Sadler, fresh off his rehab mission, looked untouchable in his work sleeve, spotting his fastball effortlessly around the edges of the area (with a big help from a nice framing from Cal) and spinning that nice curved ball in an 11 length inning with consecutive strikeouts from Moreland and Chapman. Drew Steckenrider was seventh and started with an easy three-length flyout from Andrus before edging out Aramis Garcia 0-2, who then took advantage of a throw that took a bit too much of the middle of the plate to squeeze a home run barely matching over the right field wall, just inside the post: an EV of 95 MPH and an xBA of just 0.290. Draw. Boo. BOOOO, I say.
Deolis Guerra had three flyball strikeouts in the sixth, but led the seventh by giving up a single to Jake Bauers (again) and was quickly replaced by Sergio Romo, who, if you recall, crushed the Mariners in of Friday’s loss. JP quickly lined up for a double play and Mitch Haniger couldn’t drag this team’s offensive corpse across the plate once again, striking to end any scoring threat in this set, and things felt… not great, especially after Romo came back in the eighth to sideline the Mariners 1-2-3 squad core.
The Mariners sent Paul Sewald for a second straight night of work in the eighth, but he quickly dismissed the A’s, striking out Matt Olson and Jed Lowrie (three shots for Lowrie) and forcing Laureano to eliminate. Equally effective was Kendall Graveman, who was also working back-to-back nights, securing two strikeouts and one strikeout.
Corn. Chaos Ball is here, and for some reason she really hates Lou Trivino. Trivino started his evening by releasing a first single to Luis Torrens, who literally just released his bat against 96 and was awarded with a hit, then walked Kelenic (who quietly had another good drummer tonight. Yay Jarred .). Shed Long came in to pinch the blow, theoretically to sacrifice decay, and hit instead, a call that I don’t like since Trivino had a bit of trouble throwing strikes, as evidenced by his move to 3- 0 against Bauers in the next at bat. Also categorized under things I don’t like: having JP Crawford, who’s been on an icy tear lately, swinging, as he exploited the choice of a home defensive player for the second in the round. This brought Mitch Haniger with two strikeouts. Could Mitch Magic happen again? It seems to ask so much.
Too much to ask, says Chaos Ball, and asks Mitchell Evan Haniger, who has done so much, for a little helping hand.
And where there was only one set of footprints, that’s where Mitch Haniger once again carried this team. And where there was only one set of footprints and they were doing Charleston over hot coals on top of an active volcano with a group of hungry hippos at the bottom, there it is. that Chaos Ball transported us.