“Being a virgin at the time in this context made me feel like an impostor. “
In an essay for Harper’s Bazaar UK, Mischa Barton explained that she was sexualized from a young age and felt compelled to lose her virginity to an older man while filming. CO
Mischa has previously explained how “dealing with the scale of the invasion I had in my personal life” prompted her to leave. CO, as well as the “harassment” of the men on the set.
“The truth is, sex has always been a part of my career,” Mischa wrote. “To this day, after finding the courage to open a conversation about my experiences on set as a young girl, I was shut down again and publicly labeled a ‘nightmare’ to work with. “
However, things started to pick up speed when she was cast to play Marissa Cooper at the age of 18. opportunity to speak for myself. “
“Even being a virgin at the time in that context made me feel like a fraud,” Mischa continued, explaining how playing such a confident character on a show where teens were having sex had made her feel like she was having sex. feel under pressure. “I knew it was important to push that thing – my virginity – that loomed over me, the elephant in the room if you will, out of the way. I started to really worry that I wouldn’t be able to play this character if I did. do not hurry and mature a bit. “
“Have I ever felt pressured to have sex with someone?” Well, after being chased by older men in my thirties, I finally did the deed. I feel a little guilty because I let him do it. I felt so much pressure to have sex, not just from him, but from society in general. “
Mischa’s love life led the paparazzi to become extremely intrusive, which created tension on set. “No one was happy that there was so much media attention on me compared to the rest of the cast; it made a lot of noise. They thought I was looking to advertise too because the person I was dating at the time was a well-known person in LA circles. I wasn’t looking for attention, but by then it had started to snowball. “
After years of paparazzi harassing her to the point that she felt she couldn’t leave her house, Mischa explained, “What happened gave me PTSD. In the years that followed, the cameras bothered me; me a panic attack and makes me extremely paranoid. I would have full-blown panic attacks. I have been to very dark places. ”
“I can’t stay silent anymore, because these things always happen – the exploitation of young girls, of people of color, of all women, sexualized while being separated and humiliated for being alive in their own bodies. If my story can help even a young girl defend herself and don’t let the world bring them down, then it will all be worth it. We have to collectively heal as a society and I now know that it starts from within, ”Mischa concluded.
You can read the full essay here.
Keep up to date with the latest daily buzz with the BuzzFeed Daily newsletter!