Do you want to hear something that will blow your mind? I mean, other than the fact that it’s been a week and Kat is still married? According to the New York Times – “There is not a single documented COVID infection in the world, caused by occasional outdoor interactions, such as walking past someone on a street or eating at a nearby table. ” Yes, you heard right. The New York Fricken Times admits open-air COVID transmission is the biggest myth since Trump colluded with Russia.
Not a single documented COVID infection worldwide from casual interactions outdoors. Like dinner, take a stroll or finger Jesse Waters. What to do at every opportunity. And yet, what do you see?
People outside in masks, sometimes wearing two, others wearing face shields – like they’re about to clean Shane MacGowan’s teeth – he’s the lead singer of the Pogues. That’s why I’m telling you to floss Kat! She’s not listening.
So how did we come to this? First: we have been lied to. Last month, the CDC told us that less than 10% of transmissions come from outside. Which is true – technically, “point one percent” is less than 10 percent. And that’s probably the actual rate of transmission. Point one percent – not ten. It’s a hundredfold difference, I think.
But, of course, the media broadcast that huge number like herpes in a hive full of slutty bees. And now everyone looks like Michael Jackson impersonators in their stupid, useless masks. Jogging. On bikes. In the swimming pools. It’s embarrassing to be human! We all look like fools. Because it’s useless.
It’s like wearing a seat belt for lunch. Or a football helmet in bed. Thank goodness those days are behind me.
So the CDC lied to us. They made a statement which they knew to be technically accurate, but intended to be misleading. True, a tenth of a percent is literally less than ten percent. This is like saying that there are less than 10,000 black bear attacks per year in the United States. That’s right, there is about one black bear attack per year. I bet it’s the same bear and the same guy. The pervert. The worst part? The bear was not wearing a mask!
So the mask guidelines are literally a cover-up! The CDC always says that if you are not vaccinated you should wear masks outside, and even those vaccinated should wear them at big events like concerts, sporting events and “We Love Greg Gutfeld” gatherings. . And they always ask children to wear them to summer camp at all times. Which looks good on me because I hate children but I know it’s wrong.
But apart from Operation Warp Speed, our response to the pandemic is not science-based. It is based on science fiction. I wonder how our angry white male feels about this.
Tom Shillue as an angry white male: Masks? No, I don’t wear one. Also, it would interfere with my opera cycling.
So – even though the statistics tell us otherwise – the media continues to peddle fear. Creating docile and obedient readers is their stock in trade, their business model. And when they run out of frightening stats, they literally climb a mountain to find more.
The Washington Post just published an article about the spread of COVID among climbers of Mount Everest. The press will literally go to the ends of the earth to find new places where people will be afraid of COVID. Yes, people who climb Mount Everest are at risk of COVID – as opposed to the normal way of dying on Mount Everest. Who is impaled on a pile of frozen shit.
But the normal risk of dying on the mountain is between 0.5 and 1.1%. Or to put it another way, it’s just under a thousand percent. But that’s higher than the death rate for a 25-year-old from COVID at any altitude. Something tells me when you go to Nepal to find the untold story of COVID – you get desperate. I am still waiting for the COVID number of people who live under the sea.
So why is the mask lying so badly? This is another transparent deception that makes the average person skeptical of anything the government tells us about COVID. Even the real stuff. And that creates conflict between the self-righteous a-holes and the nice people they mask to shame.
Video of a man shaming a woman without a mask: I want you to know that your callousness is ridiculous. I don’t have grandparents anymore because of this virus because of people like you who don’t want to wear masks in the store. It’s ridiculous actually. It is callous and disgusting as a human being for you to show all these people so much privilege. There are so many old people here with health issues
Woman: I am pregnant
Man: oh awesome – whoop dee congratulations on your pregnancy – this is ridiculous and i want you to know – you are in front of a candid camera
God, I hope when this nice lady’s baby is born, he’ll grow up and beat that guy’s shit.
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The truth is that the media played on the angle of the mask because they saw it as another way of dividing the country in two. This is the only calculation they’re good at – division. You wear masks – you are a patriot; don’t wear them and you are a Neanderthal trying to kill my grandmother.
All this to keep us angry and divided. But the truth is quite different. So leave the masks outside. Except you – the media. After lying to millions of people, I would hide my face too.
This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld’s opening monologue in the May 11, 2021 edition of “Gutfeld!” “