TikTok star Loren Gray talks about her experience of sexual assault

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Loren Gray, Teen Choice Awards 2018

Scott Kirkland / FOX

Loren Gray opened its doors to its 43 million followers on TikTok yesterday by detailing its experience of sexual assault in a powerful and edifying post.

“I want to tell you my real story,” began the 18-year-old singer and social media personality.

Beginning with a photo of his younger self, Gray shared his journey: “It was me, more than five years ago, shortly before my 13th birthday. Back then, my innocence was stolen from me in the basement of someone I trusted. I only talked about it to one person and she remains my best friend to this day. We cried together in my bathroom for hours. “

“I had a hard time putting the pieces together to find out why it happened to me,” she said. “It took me two months to finally tell my parents. I felt dirty, hopeless, broken and worthless. I was confused and scared. I felt like it was my fault. “

Gray went on to explain how the incident affected his sense of self and how becoming a social media star brought him joy, but also undeserved shame and aggression.

“I went to school at home and started making videos to pass the time and alleviate some of the loneliness and isolation I had felt,” she said. “People were watching my videos and even though I was still struggling, I felt like I had finally found people who cared, whatever my situation. Although, from time to time, comments and questions are too much. She looks like a whore. ‘ ‘Are you a virgin?’ “

She continued, “I have always been afraid to tell my story to people, worried that people would see me differently and that I would lose those I cared about. I’m now 18 and I realized that my past didn’t define me. my fault and I never deserved it. I came out stronger and I am so proud of myself. There is light at the end of the tunnel and if my story can help even ONE person, then for me it is a story worth telling. ”

@lorengray

TW. When I say you have helped me more than you think, I mean it.

? his original – marbarboyce

In a follow-up post on Twitter, Gray addressed her fans in a statement about the revelation – and why she decided to share it when she did.

“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry I don’t have a lot of online today,” said Gray. “It has been very difficult for me to share this part of my life in such a public way. I got a message that someone knew. But I know how fast words travel and I wanted to be the one to tell my story. “

Fortunately, Gray saw a silver lining share his own trauma.

“I am overwhelmed by the support and love I have felt today,” she said. “But it also breaks my heart how often this happens. I am very fortunate to have such supportive friends and family who have never judged or blamed. I’m very grateful. Although I was forced to grow quickly and lose part of myself in the process, I would not change anything in my life, every experience I have had has taught me something. Although I hate feeling forced to share this prematurely, I have no regrets because I am no longer ashamed. ”

Gray explained that she decided to publish these messages as text because it was always difficult for her to speak out loud, but it has felt a huge amount of love since opening up to the world.

“I started making videos to deal with feelings of isolation and loneliness. My life really changed when you all got in. For the first time, I felt love, as if my past had been erased and no longer defined me, “she said. concluded. “So when I say that you give me a purpose and that you have helped me through the darkest moments of my life, I meant it from the bottom of my heart. I hope this can shed light on the gravity of the sexual assault and give hope to anyone who can relate. I love you all so much. Thanks for listening. ”



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